In Your Orbit
by adriareads
Summary: When Bellamy Blake moves back home and into Clarke's flat, things go haywire. After 3 years in Rome avoiding her, building their friendship from the ashes won't be easy, or PG. Neither will finding out what happened to Aurora, Wells and Jake. Angst, humour and comfort ensue. Slowest of all slow burns, you've been warned!
1. We're older now, the light is dim

Hey guys! So this is my first fanfic in years and the first on this account so bear with me with any mistakes I may make. I'm from New Zealand so I may not get all the Americanisms, or the college system right. Feel free to correct me on anything; I'm always down for constructive criticism! Heads up, this is going to be a slow slow burn. Chapter title is from the song O' Children by Nick Cave. Hope you enjoy the Bellarke!

* * *

"I'd kill for a coffee… literally."

Clarke Griffin burst into the house she shared with her two best friends looking like death warmed up. Having finished her last final of her second year of med school and after only 1 of her usual 3 before-noon coffees she was about ready to fall asleep on her feet.

Raven Reyes, one of said best friends, had other ideas. She leapt from her spot on the couch as books went flying and launched herself at Clarke.

"Woo! It's officially summer now baby!" She squealed.

"I don't know how you move so fast with that brace," Clarke laughed, pulling her friend in for a hug.

Only last year Raven had been crossing the street downtown with the third of their trio Octavia Blake. The two had been leaving a frat party and forgot to look before crossing. It was only a quick glance up that gave Raven any notice of the incoming motorcycle and in that split second she pushed Octavia out of the way, taking the full force of the collision herself. Octavia only suffered minor bruising, but Raven had been in the hospital for months. When she finally came out she was left with limited use of her left leg due to nerve damage, yet was just as energetic as always.

Clarke thought she was the bravest person she'd ever known. Crazy, yet brave.

Raven just smiled, heading to the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee, "It's all in the passion Griffin!"

Clarke followed, rolling her eyes as Raven rummaged through the cupboards, knowing exactly what she was looking for. Sure enough, with an 'aha' from Raven, out came the whiskey. As she poured a generous amount ( _far too generous – in Clarke's opinion)_ into each coffee mug, she smirked and Clarke groaned pre-emptively, blue eyes dropped to the steaming mug she was handed.

"Soo…"

"So what Raven?" She sighed, knowing this could only be about Bellamy, Octavia's older brother and also Clarke's ex friend with benefits. If you could call having sex sporadically in freshman year, fighting so loudly Clarke lost her voice for days, and awkwardly avoiding each other ever since any semblance of 'friends'.

Raven smiled sweetly, "well he moves in in t minus 2 hours, and I thought we may as well have a party to chill us the fuck out because I can guarantee the first few hours are gonna be the worst. You're the last to finish the semester so it's perfect timing too!"

Clarke sipped on her _very strong_ coffee and nodded, "I mean I'd be less awkward if I were drunk so that's always a positive. I suppose it'd be sort of like ripping off the band aid."

She looked up from her coffee and laid her hand on Raven's knee before continuing. "I'm okay you know, it was years ago. Anyway, it's his house, he's not even moving in he's coming home. I suppose I can just move out if it goes south."

She took a sip of the coffee and sighed. Bellamy Blake. The man who had firmly planted himself under her skin since she was five and he ten and he burnt her favourite soft toy when he found out Octavia invited the rich kid over. They feuded until she was thirteen and his mother was murdered. She had rushed up to the house he now owned to find him sitting on the front porch with his head in his hands. As she pulled his large hand into hers and leant into him Clarke's heart ached with his pain. From then on Bellamy was always around, which she never understood because he worked almost full time at the café down the street while studying classics at Yale. He had a full ride to college, being the smart and hardworking person he was, but was always short of money. Clarke was constantly amazed by the way he put Octavia first, and how saving every spare penny so he could buy her a prom dress had turned into putting her through college.

It was when she was 16 that they became close. He would offer her books to read and she would cook for him and Octavia because (as Clarke liked to point out) his cooking was _awful_. She spent so much time at their run-down house, her father liked to joke that she might as well move in. In freshman year of pre-med Bellamy was her T.A. in her classics elective, and he tutored her whenever he visited the dorms. Honestly she'd only taken the class to be around him, yet funnily enough that was the class that she had met Finn in.

Finn Collins brought heartbreak into her life. He turned her into the other woman when three months into the relationship Raven stormed into her room and announced herself Finn's girlfriend of four years and _who the fuck was Clarke?_ The only good thing to come out of that shit storm was Raven. Unfortunately, it also introduced her to alcohol and it was at one of the parties the Blake siblings threw that everything had got out of hand. She was falling on the floor and Bellamy had smirked his _goddamn_ smirk while reaching to pick her up. He'd thrown her over his shoulder and declared it was her bedtime – as he used to when she was young. Only she wasn't thirteen anymore and once in her room she'd reached up to trace his freckles. With her lips. The sex continued for months until one morning Bellamy shook his head and said it was a mistake – Octavia shouldn't have to deal with the outcome of them falling out over sex of all things. In the end it was obsolete because the fight that followed had gone down in fight wall of fame history, and they'd never spoken again.

Even when her father had been killed in a car her mother was driving early sophomore year, he didn't speak to her, didn't offer her the same comfort she gave him all those years ago. Instead he moved to Rome for almost three years to fast track his studies and had only come back to a job as a professor at his alma mater. The youngest professor Yale has ever had because _of course_ Bellamy would be. He was the biggest nerd she'd ever met. She didn't want to be proud of him, but she was even after the giant shit show of everything they'd been through she was happy that at least against all odds he'd made it.

It was going to be a long day.

"Uh Griffin? Earth to Clarke?" Raven waved her hand in front of the blonde's blank face.

Clarke started and hopped off her spot on the bench, "sorry my heads in the clouds babe, and this coffee is doing nothing to help. I think I'm gonna take a nap so I don't fall asleep during the party. I really want to celebrate."

Raven raised her eyebrows, "Alright that doesn't sound fake at all but I'll take your word for it, I expect you bright and alert for beer pong later Grif!"

Clarke snorted, shaking her head in exasperation as she headed to her room setting her alarm for an hour from now and crashing before her head hit the pillow.

* * *

The alarm didn't go off. Of course the alarm didn't go off. Clarke had spent months grumbling about needing a new (and preferably working) phone. She groaned and rolled over to check the time only to notice six texts and _holy shit it was 5pm._ She'd slept for five hours! Which meant Bellamy would already be settled into his room and Raven would be dying to drink. She rubbed her eyes to wake herself up before opening the first text.

 **Ravenclaw 2:12pm:** Bet ur alarm didn't go off. Idiot get a new phone already! Just letting you know big Blake's here and unpacking

 **Ravenclaw 2:44pm:** He has more books than you girl wtf, how can anyone own this many books?!

 **Ravenclaw 3:15pm:** Wakey wakey wakey

 **Ravenclaw 3:58pm:** If I didn't know you were exhausted and seriously value our beerpong game tonight I'd come in there and wake you myself. He's already driving me crazy! I don't know anything about this classics shit! I'm a real functioning person not a museum curator and MY ARMS ARE KILLING ME FROM CARRYING ALL THE BOXES OF BOOKS

 **Ravenclaw 4:39pm:** Okay O's back now I can stop entertaining this crazy person, wear the black top when you finally wake your lazy ass up, it makes your boobs look great and I'm still in revenge mode :)

 **Griffindor 5:03pm:** I'm awake! Oh my god Raven it's been years and ur insane I'm over what happened pleeeaase don't make this anymore awkward than it has to be :p also books are good, read more ur so uncultured it hurts hahaha

Clarke quickly typed out her reply, swung her legs over the side of her bed and noticed a text from O.

 **Octabae 4:50pm:** Sup my beautiful bff who I'd totally bone if it weren't for Lincoln. So Bell's here and I just wanted to be serious for once in my life. . . lol. I had a word to him about the fight and I get the impression he's ready to let go if you are, either way he'll leave you alone I made sure of it. No grumpy Bellamy in this house babe! Now wake the fuck up and party with me, I'm going to Florida in a week and I'll miss u!

 **Griffindor 5:06pm:** Ur only going for 2 weeks you cry baby. Thanks though, it means a lot. Got to get over it at some point. Just gonna jump in the shower, make me a drink bitch xo

After her quick shower Clarke opened her closet , thought _fuck it_ and grabbed her black shirt. Raven was right it was hot as fuck; loose fitting and ridiculously low cut, with a built in black choker. Pulling it on with a pair of denim shorts she paused at her bedroom door for a second before shaking her head. She wasn't having second thoughts! She wouldn't let herself. Hell this was her house too and she would not be reduced to feeling awkward in it because Bellamy Blake came back from Rome.

* * *

She found her friends out on the deck in the evening sun, Octavia leaning against Lincoln as she talked animatedly with her brother and Raven working the barbeque. No one noticed her quietly slip outside. She strode over to Raven and wrapped her arms around her waist, resting her chin on her friends shoulder. "Anything I can do?"

Raven popped open a beer, "you can drink this. Good to see you've finally risen from the dead by the way."

Clarke pulled away and slapped her arm "hey! I'll have you know I've been working so ha-"

"Clarkey!"

She had about a second to put down her beer before the whirlwind that was Octavia Blake crashed into her and twirled her around in circles. "You've finally finished! I'm so proud of you!"

She laughed and pushed the brunette away, "I haven't got my results back yet you crazy person, but thanks! It feels so surreal to have nothing due, and no study to do."

Octavia scoffed, "oh as if you won't study over summer, you're one of the biggest nerds I know honestly between you and my brother I don't know how I turned out so cool."

At the mention of said brother, she looked up to see him staring intently at her. Cool blue eyes met dark brown with a questioning gaze and he bobbed his head in a short nod.

"Princess."

She smiled before she could remember to be angry. He looked the same as always, tall and dark and broody. He'd let his hair grow out and had to run his hands through it to get it out of his eyes. It suited him, along with his new tan. It seemed impossible for the man to get _more tanned_ but here he was in her house definitely affected by the sun and the apparent lack of scissors in Rome, pulling it off in a way only he could. He was so familiar to her, yet a total stranger at the same time.

"Hey Bellamy."

Before the silence could get any more awkward the door to the deck slid open and the rest of their friends waltzed in, greeting Bellamy with hugs. Congratulations to Clarke for finally finishing the semester after everyone else was already in summer mode were thrown around and beers opened. They'd been friends for as long as she could remember, and now for the first time in a long time the group was back together. It was like high school all over again. She smiled to herself, sipping at her beer. Even Bellamy being back couldn't take this happiness away from her. Despite them all growing up, the dynamic was the same as always.

Monty and Jasper sat on each tyre swing, passing a joint between them, while Miller shouted about arresting them from the treehouse he and Bellamy perched in above the two. Clarke burst out laughing and Octavia, standing beside her on the deck, grinned. "He's been really on my case lately about getting them to stop smoking around us, as if anything I say will ever make them stop."

"How is work? Are you excited about the seminar?" Clarke nudged her shoulder, took a last swig from her beer and set about making a drink before realising.

"Hey you never actually made me a drink! Bitch."

Octavia jumped towards the table and grabbed the gin out of the blonde's hand, "I never said when I'd make it, but hey would you look at that I'm doing it right now."

Clarke stuck her tongue out at her and giggled, stepping back to let the self-appointed bartender at every party they ever held do her job. Well, she generally made about three drinks before she got bored, but the title had officially been taken by the fiery Blake.

"Yeah work's good, Clarke. You know Brian? Miller's ex?"

Clarke nodded, Octavia was a cop along with her boyfriend Lincoln, a detective who had been her supervisor as a recruit, and Miller who was Lincoln's partner. She was still a grunt but had every intention to become a top detective and possibly work for the FBI in the future. Octavia's partner Murphy hadn't been able to make it tonight.

"Well he was shot a few weeks ago, he's back in the street now and all but I think Miller's on edge. Well I mean of course he's on edge. Brian didn't take well to him rushing to his hospital bed and they kind of had a fight. I think Harper had to drag him out of there, they were going to call security."

"Jesus," Clarke's eyebrows were bunched up together, "poor Miller."

"Yep," Octavia handed her the finished gin and tonic.

"It gets worse too. With the department sending Lincoln and I to Florida for two weeks, Miller's having to take over supervisory duties and you guessed it, that means he has to supervise Brian. It can only go one of two ways to be honest, they'll end up pronouncing their love for each other and fucking in the station or there won't be a station to come back to."

Clarke grimaced and took a sip of her drink. "Jesus O, this is more gin than tonic!"

"Only the best for you." Octavia reached up and messed up her hair with a fond smile.

She made a kissy face at her and Clarke laughed, walking over to the couch and pulling Raven from it. "Come on babe time for beer pong! Dream team here we come!"

They high-fived and looked around for a pair stupid enough to challenge them in the game. Monty and Jasper agreed to try, boasting that they were better than the two. Which of course was a marijuana induced lie. Clarke lost herself in the fun of the game and forgot about Bellamy while she and Raven destroyed team upon team of hopefuls.

* * *

Four games of beer pong later and she, along with everyone else, was well and truly drunk.

Fumbling into the kitchen she rummaged through the cupboards looking for the last of her cookies. When she found them her face lit up in a grin and she jumped onto the counter to stuff them in her mouth. Everything tasted so good when she was drunk and the whole group always made fun of how much she could eat when they drank. Chocolate chips melted in her mouth and she sighed, completely intent to devour the whole bag.

"I see nothing's changed with you then."

She froze. What was he doing in here? There must be some sort of silent agreement to never be alone together right? Or was that just how she thought this arrangement would work?

He pushed a hand through his hair and cleared his throat, clearly he had something to say. It reminded her uncomfortably of another life and her eyes narrowed. She put down the bag of cookies and hopped off the bench, crossing her arms. The alcohol in her veins really wasn't helping her resolution to be peaceful with him especially as the memories of the two of them in this very kitchen came rushing back to her.

"What do you want Bellamy?"

Again his hand rushed to his hair and he fidgeted. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry Clarke, O told me I should apologize and seeing you tonight has me realizing how much I missed you while I was gone."

Was he fucking kidding? "Sorry for what Bellamy?" She spat.

"Sorry for your stupid excuse? Sorry for up and leaving the country without saying goodbye? Sorry for not even bothering to call or send a _fucking email_ for two whole years? Or sorry for not even saying a word when my dad, dad-"

Her voice cracked and she brushed furiously at her eyes. No way was she going to cry in front of fucking Bellamy. He stood there wordless, eyes glued to the floor and she couldn't for the life of her tell what he was thinking, which just made her blood boil.

Turning her back on him she grabbed her cookies, making her way out of the kitchen to her room. "And don't you dare apologize because O told you to. You've always been a coward Bellamy. Fuck you."

He grabbed her arm and she clenched her jaw, turning to him. His eyes were on fire and he snarled at her. "A coward huh, _Princess_? Don't you fucking dare. You don't know a thing about what I've been through and what I've had to do."

The fire in her eyes matched that in his as she pulled herself out of his grasp. "I've known you for seventeen years Blake, and after what you did to me you will always be the biggest coward I've ever known."

She bolted to the sanctuary of her bedroom, ignoring worried looks from her friends in the living room.

"The world doesn't revolve around you, Princess!" He shouted after her, and she slammed her door angrily, ignoring worried looks from her friends in the living room. She slid down the wall in furious tears.

Turns out she was wrong about two things today. She was not okay with him, and every day was going to be a long day with Bellamy Blake back in town.

* * *

Thanks for reading guys! Please review hope you enjoyed it, I aim to upload every week but my nursing exams are in a few weeks so I may not be able to 100% stick to that. Again, reviews will totally help with that!


	2. We aint kids no more

Clarke awoke the next morning with makeup smeared down the left side of her face and an ache in her neck. Stifling a yawn and gazing suspiciously at the light streaming through her window, she checked the time. 2pm. She almost laughed with delight. It had been impossible to get any sleep last semester and after averaging five hours a night for god knows how long, twelve hours was a miracle. Clarke stretched and groaned at how good it felt before forcing herself out of bed.

She'd been offered Aurora's old room when she moved in, mainly because it had an adjoining bathroom and as close as Octavia and Raven were, Octavia couldn't imagine renting her dead mother's room to anyone but Clarke. Apparently it had been Bellamy's idea but he was in Rome at the time and Clarke couldn't handle the idea that he still thought of her. The bathroom in question was a mess and she swore as she tripped over a pile of clothes on the way to the shower. _This place needs a cleaning crew,_ she thought, deciding against doing any of it today. No, today she was going to relax. In the scalding shower she decided on painting, it had been far too long since she'd put brush to canvas. Almost a year now, in fact. Oh the joys of med school. Jumping out of the shower, Clarke dried her hair and got ready for the day with a spring in her step.

It was quiet in the house, and sparkling clean too. Her roommates must have cleared away the mess while she slept. Clarke shuffled over to her coffee pot; despite her good mood she had a serious addiction and never made it very far without coffee in her system. Coffee was her life. She frowned at the note that had been left on top of the pot. Octavia's messy scrawl gave up the absolute _worst_ news. Seriously, someone could have died and Clarke would have been happier.

 _Hey Babe,_

 _Ray's at work and I've taken Bell to the store to stock up on groceries. He kind of drank all of your coffee this morning... He says he thought it was mine but I swear the dick is winding you up, be the bigger person please! I can't have my favourite people fighting all the time! I'll buy you some more, promise!_

 _We cleaned up too so you can't be made at us, LOVE YOU xxx_

Clarke saw red. So much for the spring in her step. "Fucking Bellamy!"

She counted to ten, clenched her fists and took a few deep breaths. It took ten minutes of colourful swearing before Clarke realised there was nothing she could do about it. Octavia clearly wanted them to be civil and she could totally handle that. At least until O was in Florida, after that all Hell would break loose. _Just cling to the idea of Florida, Clarke, then you can kill him_. She had to buy new painting supplies anyway so decided to just get a coffee at The Ark, the coffee shop Jasper and Monty worked at over summer. She pulled out her phone to see if either were working (because by God she needed someone to vent to) grabbed her shoes and wallet and at the last minute picked up a tattered copy of _All Along the Western Front_ which could only be Bellamy's. It was just sitting there on the coffee table, and he'd used up her fucking coffee. Be the bigger person her ass.

* * *

The door to the café slammed behind her and she heard enthusiastic shouts of "Clarke!" from the till. Jasper and Monty waved to her as she collapsed at her favourite stool.

"I fucking hate Bellamy!" Clarke declared, shoving loose change across the counter.

"I assume this isn't about last night then?" Monty passed her a coffee and she hummed gratefully, taking a large gulp. It was hot, but that was the way she liked her coffee. Black, steaming and full of caffeine.

"Nope!" She popped the 'p' sound, "he drank all my fucking coffee this morning."

Jasper snorted and Clarke glared at him. "Seriously guys, it's not even been a full day of living with him and he drank all my coffee. Not even the devil would dare to take coffee away from me."

She felt a hand on her shoulder, "she's right guys no one in their right mind would take coffee from our favourite overdramatic addict."

"Harper! Hey! I thought you had a shift today?" Clarke jumped up to give her a hug.

"I do," the girl laughed, gesturing at her scrubs as Clarke mumbled something under her breath about a lack of coffee and therefore intelligence.

"Just popping by on my break to get a coffee, I'm so dead after last night, and I clearly remember this guy offering me a free one if I conquered the tequila shots, which I totally did." The nurse gestured to a sheepish looking Monty who shrugged and handed over a coffee that he had clearly made the moment she walked in the door.

Clarke rolled her eyes, "you didn't shout me a coffee Monty! What's Harper got that I don't?"

Jasper stifled a laugh and Monty turned a bright shade of red, mumbling that _not everyone was as rich as Clarke Griffin_. Her face broke into a teasing smile and her eyes shone as she ordered another coffee to go. As Clarke said goodbye to her friends, Monty still refused to look her directly in the eye.

With a coffee balanced in one hand (yes she'd gone to get another) and a few bags overflowing with art supplies in the other, Clarke stumbled into her apartment. Light flowed perfectly into the living room, soft orange and perfect to paint in. After setting her easel up and slipping into a baggy white t-shirt that was so covered in paint stains it could hardly be called white, she pulled her hair into a bun. Now all she needed was inspiration, and she knew just who to go to for it.

 **Griffindor 4:33pm:** Raaay, I'm painting and I need inspo! Hit me with your best shot xx

Her phone dinged almost straight away and Clarke giggled because of course Raven wasn't hard at work, she never was when she could wrap her boss Wick around her finger.

 **Ravenclaw 4:34pm:** The ocean and/or anything sea related! Mainly because we should go to the beach next weekend, keen?

 **Griffindor 4:36pm:** My life is so much better with you in it Reyes. I'm down for the beach! If O gets to go to Florida we can damn well have fun of our own! Thanks babe, see ya for dinner?

 **Ravenclaw 4:38pm:** Actually I'm going out for a drink with Wick after work and I'll be home late… Wish me luck!

 **Griffindor 4:40pm:** Ooh get it girl! ;) have fun! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!

Clarke reached for her headphones and lost herself in strokes of paint and extra-loud music. Occasionally she'd brush stray, unruly hairs back into place. She didn't notice when the paint ended up streaked across her face in hues of blue that brought out her eyes, just like she didn't notice her roommates come home. It wasn't until Octavia pulled a headphone unceremoniously out of her ear that she realised she wasn't alone.

Clarke smiled at the sloppy kiss her friend leaned down to press to her cheek and wiped her hands on her shirt before getting up. "Hey, how long have you been home?"

"About half an hour actually, you were totally out of it. We ended up heading into Yale as well as the store; Bell wanted to catch up with Marcus."

"Oh how is he? I haven't seen him in so long!" Marcus Kane was an old friend of her parents, and was often around during her childhood. Clarke loved him as if he was her family, and he had always been there for her. Especially when her mum left to D.C to pursue politics after the accident.

"Just as sassy and nerdy as usual! No wonder you all get along so well," Octavia laughed, "hey Bell's making pasta, you want some?"

Ah, so that explained the clanging sound of pots coming from the kitchen. Clarke was used to being the only person who made food in this house. She supposed she'd have to share that with Bellamy now too.

Following Octavia to the kitchen, Clarke spied a brand new bag of coffee on the counter. She ignored Bellamy moving around her and perked up immediately upon opening said bag and sniffing at the grounds.

"God you're like an addict," Octavia commented, echoing Harper from earlier.

"Shut up," Clarke glared, "I need this stuff to _survive,_ O." She set about making a coffee, pointedly avoiding Bellamy's glare. She was so the bigger person.

"How many have you actually had today?" Octavia pulled paperwork out of her bag, rummaging for a specific file.

"Only three! I went to the Ark. Monty totally has a crush on Harper by the way." Clarke sat down with her mug and sighed at the first sweet sip. She was in love with coffee. If she never got into a stable relationship at least coffee would always be by her side.

"Girl, that's been going on for months! You've literally been living under a rock this year." Octavia scoffed, standing up with piles of paperwork in her arms. "I'm gonna head to the study, I've gotta sort some stuff out, you ok with…?"

She gestured at the space between Clarke and Bellamy, who had his back turned to them. He was chopping carrots and seemed content to pretend neither of them existed, at least while the blonde was around. Clarke nodded her consent. "I'll call you when the food's up."

She sat in silence as Bellamy continued to use her cooking space as if it were his own (which was stupid because technically it was). He clearly knew where everything lived, which cupboard and draw held what, and it irritated her to no end. He had barely cooked in this house before he left to Rome; this had always been her territory. Now here he was, after three years, with the nerve to use _her_ coffee and take over _her_ kitchen. Not to mention he hadn't even acknowledged her.

Clarke frowned, "I thought you couldn't even cook," she muttered before she could stop herself. _Shit_. Well there goes being the bigger person.

Bellamy had his back to her and Clarke watched as he stiffened his hand stilling; gripping the knife so hard his knuckles turned white. For a minute she thought he wouldn't bite back. But this was Bellamy and he never strayed from a challenge.

"Like I said, _Princess,_ you don't know anything about me."

 _I know you're an asshole,_ she thought, leaving the room without a word. Clearly she'd been the asshole though and it grated at her. Clarke huffed, picking up the book she stole from him and threw herself onto the couch. Her heart was running a mile a minute and losing herself in a book with good coffee would calm her. It always did.

Almost half an hour had passed before Bellamy stalked past her to Octavia's room. She ducked down, hiding the cover of the book. It was an incredible read; she hadn't even noticed the time pass. From her vantage point on the couch she heard him inform his sister that dinner was ready. Clarke focussed on the book while watching Bellamy out of the corner of her eye as he marched back to the kitchen. He walked right past without a word or even a glance in her direction.

Well fuck you Bellamy Blake.

Dinner was awkward to say the least. Octavia and Bellamy chatted while Clarke pushed pasta around her plate. It was so good that she wanted to ask for the recipe but Hell would freeze over before she gave him that satisfaction. How had he learned to cook like this? The Bellamy she knew burnt toast almost daily. Evidently he'd been right and she didn't know him at all. Resentment left a funny taste in her mouth that couldn't be washed away despite the incredible food.

* * *

The next few days followed much the same as the dinner - awkward and uncomfortable for Clarke.

Octavia and Bellamy caught up on years of missed time, Raven went to her internship, and Clarke painted. By the time the end of the week rolled around she'd taken over the living room with canvases. Painting the canvases felt more accomplishing than all the assignments she'd completed this year. Taking a sip from newly brewed coffee Clarke took the chance to lean back and look at her masterpiece. Surrounding the room were scenes of the ocean, forests and a two-headed deer inspired by Bellamy (who had continued to drink her coffee in the most arrogant, aggravating way, which pissed her off so much she had painted the ugliest thing she could think of and passive-aggressively named the painting _Tall Dark Asshole_ ).

Clarke's favourite collection was in the corner. Bathed in afternoon light stood four scenes of outer space, differing in size yet each as incredible as the last. Jake Griffin had been an astronaut and she knew she'd captured his essence in these paintings. A tear escaped as she wished, not for the first time, that she'd been the one driving him home from the conference she'd skipped at the last minute. According to police reports Abby had fallen asleep at the wheel and steered the car directly into a lamp post. The most devastating moment of her life, including the death of her childhood friend Wells. The accident was three years ago but it felt to Clarke like just yesterday. It probably always would.

Clarke was pulled from her thoughts when a door banged open behind her. Hastily brushing tears from her eyes she turned to greet Octavia only to find a dishevelled Bellamy standing in the doorway, shifting his weight and rubbing at the back of his head.

Bellamy glanced at her and then the paintings, "they're really good," he pointed.

 _What?_ Clarke gaped at him and her eyebrows rose so high they threatened to reach her hairline.

"Um, thank you."

Seconds of awkward silence passed and Bellamy dropped his gaze to the floor. Clarke continued to stare comically as he walked into the kitchen without another word.

"What just happened?" Octavia walked through the doorway with an expression on her face that matched Clarke's.

"Was my brother just nice to you?" She stage whispered.

Clarke was still torn between confusion and satisfaction, "I… think so? I have no idea what that was."

Was he trying to get back in her good graces? Or was it crueller than that? Was he going to build her up just to break her down like he had years ago? One thing was for sure, she had no idea who Bellamy was anymore. For the few days he'd been staying with them he'd been openly hostile, only to be kinder than ever with no warning. To say she was confused was an understatement.

"Well before you guys had that fight the other night he did say he wanted to put it behind him, maybe he's decided fighting's not worth the trouble?"

Clarke crossed her arms. "Maybe. But just waltzing in and saying my paintings are good isn't going to change what he did."

"It could be what he sees as the first step, Clarke."

"The first step would have been not leaving at all, O." Clarke countered.

"Look I know he hurt you but-"

"You really don't O, you really have no idea."

"He left me too Clarke! I'm his fucking sister and I've forgiven him. Bell never does anything without a reason, why don't you just ask him what his reason was?"

"He didn't just leave. He should have called when dad died, I was there for him when your mum died. There's no reason that will ever make that okay."

Clarke was bitter. She had every right to be, but it wasn't like her to hold on to things. Normally, she forgave ever misstep. Hell she'd even forgiven _Finn_. Her therapist (because she had to get one after Jake, doctors' orders) had spent years teaching her about the benefits of letting go.

 _Octavia,_ she thought, _she needs us to get along_. Those words had become a mantra over the week. Every time Bellamy frustrated her she pictured her best friend, and how Bellamy and Clarke were the only family she had. She had to do this for Octavia.

With an inward snarl Clarke clamped the bitter feeling down, deciding she really didn't like the look that had crept into Octavia's expression. The brown eyes were filled with pity.

"I'm sorry-" Octavia began, but Clarke cut her off.

"It's fine love, don't worry about it let's just invite the others around, do a movie night or something? It's your last night in town after all."

Octavia gave her an unreadable look and nodded, face splitting in a grin.

"I'll text the guys, movie night with drinking games?"

Clarke laughed; she lived with a bunch of alcoholics. Oh how she loved them and their self-destructive ways.

"Oh and O," Clarke stood up and walked over to her room, "I'll try with Bellamy."

 _No promises though,_ she added in her head. Picking up the book she'd stolen from its innocent place on her bedside table, she sighed. The first step was always the hardest. A deep breath (or about 5 minutes of deep breathing) later and she paced back past Octavia into the kitchen.

Bellamy was messing with her coffee maker and Clarke cleared her throat, swallowing down the frustration. He turned to her with a guilty look in his _goddamn puppy dog eyes_ and she bit back a snarky comment. Extending her hand she offered the book to Bellamy and a look of surprise crossed his face.

"I wondered where this went."

"Yeah sorry, I kind of stole it. I was mad at you after the whole coffee thing." Clarke pointedly glanced at the coffee pot in his hands.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry I just, yeah," Bellamy stuttered and shoved a hand through his tousled black locks.

Clarke swallowed and tore her gaze from his hair. There was no way she wanted to reach out and smooth it down again. What was wrong with her? _Get it together, Griffin._

"It's a really good book."

Bellamy blinked and then offered a sweet smile. "I know right! A girl I dated, Roma, actually leant it to me. I kept it when we didn't work out as a reminder."

Clarke paled. Suddenly the air was tight and she couldn't breathe. _You don't know anything about me_ played in her mind. Of course he would have had relationships in Rome that she knew nothing about, he was there for _three years_ after all _._ A knot formed in her stomach but she pushed it down. _Baby steps, Griffin._

"Oh, right. Well, thanks."

"Hey guys! Did I just hear that right?" Raven jumped cheerfully onto the counter next to them. "Your girlfriends name was Roma? While you were living in Rome? You've got to see how funny this is!"

Bellamy laughed, actually laughed, which set the record for the most emotion he'd shown around Clarke in a week. It was a familiar sound, lighting up his face and subsequently the whole room. He'd always had that affect.

"The jokes that were made about that you wouldn't believe. _Ciao, I'm Roma, from Rome,"_ Bellamy mocked in a sing song voice. "That was the way she introduced herself and it never failed to break the ice."

"I'm still buzzing over her name, your ship name could have been Broma! Oh the opportunities Blake!"

"The opportunity wasn't missed Reyes, even in Rome I was able to make friends with a sense of humour, you know. It's Rome, not Nazi Germany."

Bellamy opened the fridge and popped a bottle of beer open, passed it to Raven and grabbed another for Clarke. She smiled her thanks at him as he leaned back against the fridge, taking a long swig from his own bottle.

"To find people who are funny you have to be funny yourself, wherever you are," Raven winked.

The knot in Clarke's stomach eased slowly as she observed the back and forth banter between Raven and Bellamy. Maybe Bellamy being back in town wouldn't be so bad after all? Clarke finished her beer, tilting her head slightly and zoning back into the conversation.

"So what happened between you and Roma?" Raven asked.

Bellamy tensed; a bittersweet smile laced with pain appeared on his face.

"She died."


End file.
